Conspiracy Theory Saturdays: Mattress Firm Is A Secret Money Laundering Operation

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**Note** Baseball is starting this week so this will be the last CTS blog until the All Star Break. But, not to worry! I still have plenty of conspiracy theories on the list that I haven’t touched on yet!


Last year between football ending and baseball starting, I had a good amount of free time on my hands. I was browsing on Reddit when I ran across an incredible thread about the Denver airport being a cover for a government run protection bunker of sorts.

I began cataloging different conspiracy theories that I heard about during the course of the year, knowing that I wanted to blog about some of the most absurd theories. Once I started talking to people about this idea, conspiracy theories started coming out of the woodwork. I couldn’t note them down fast enough.

I want to be incredibly clear. I am only blogging about the conspiracy theory for the sake of laughs. I do not believe in most of these theories. They are just that: theories.


Image result for mattress firm

The Theory: Mattress Firm is a secret, money laundering operation that is masked by the sale of mattresses and bedding accessories. The Mattress Firm stores on every corner are part of the sham.

What The Truthers Say? A couple of years back, there was a post on Reddit that floated the idea that Mattress Firm may be a front for a major money laundering operation. The theory is backed up by several facts that are incredibly hard to ignore, topped off with how the company responded.

It starts with the sheer amount of Mattress Firm stores there are, in general. As of 2018, there are 3,500 Mattress Firm locations. With as many locations as there are, how could one store possibly be profitable? A person needs a new mattress, what? Every 10 years?

Image result for map of mattress firm locations

There are definitely a lot of locations but lets look at a more granular level:

Look at this map for locations in Austin, Texas. Albeit, one of these is a clearance store, but the other two are right across the highway from each other. How could anyone need more than one mattress store within a 1 mile area?

The next item that I’ve heard about, consistently, is the company’s response to this theory. Now, this theory got started online, and was most likely an inquisitive joke. Mattress Firm, however, responded in a very defensive manner:

They did admit to it sounding like a joke, but also got really defensive, quicker than intended. What do you have to hide, Mattress Firm? Kinda feels like you’re trying to brush this away.

The Commentary: I’ll admit, this conspiracy theory makes me laugh harder than most. The very idea being floated in to the universe at all is a prime example of how amazing the internet can be, at times.

Most of the conspiracy theories that I’ve written about seem absolutely absurd, and while this one does as well, I’m not sure that someone didn’t speak a small kernel of truth in to existence.

You have to admit, though, that 3,500 mattress stores does seem like a lot of stores. I mean look at how many stores are in New York City alone:

It’s not like you go down to the mattress store and walk out carrying the mattress, especially in NYC. (Usually, anyway. I may need Gronovo to check me me on this)

The way that the company responded, seemed very defensive, as well. When it comes to these types of things, you have to laugh it off as a joke. Why even respond at all? Are you really that worried about your reputation amongst the mattress community? Seems aggressive.

This conspiracy theory is probably a bust but it is certainly fun to kick around in your head. Wouldn’t it be wild if it were true?

1 comments on “Conspiracy Theory Saturdays: Mattress Firm Is A Secret Money Laundering Operation”

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